Aspects of forgiveness and finding peace with bitch ass apologies
for·give·ness
/fərˈɡivnəs/
noun
the action or process of forgiving or being forgiven.
At times, it's as if I'm attempting to harness the Force to persuade myself that I'm content with everything, all while secretly yearning to unleash my inner Darth Vader and create chaos of cosmic proportions. Yet, here I am, firmly entrenched in my era of grace, radiating Yoda-like vibes (or at least aspiring to). I’m still working out that perfect balance of knowing when to speak your truth and just letting go and giving space. I tend to lean giving space…
Recently, forgiveness has been occupying my thoughts, especially since receiving one of the most insincere apologies from someone I deeply care for. All the “right words” where said, but the shit just vibrated low. I've grown to detest phrases like "It wasn’t my intention" or "I’m sorry you feel that way." I understand I’m responsible for my feelings, but it feels like accountability for poor behaviour is becoming increasingly rare, overshadowed by “proper” yet impersonal language. Frankly, I've reached my limit with it. Its bullshit. I know everything is perception and there is so much unknow data in every situation, but this recent experience has me rethinking the approach and language of forgiveness. Even I will move differently in life should when issuing apologies in the future.
I feel like if you’re going to act like a bitch,
be a bitch, don’t act like one then pretend you’re not while apologizing.
Own your shit. Then at least your behaviour is respectable
because you vibrate authentic.
